One thing God is all about is relationship: relationship with us and our relationships with each other. One thing that all relationships have in common is that they had a starting point. They all had to start somewhere. And most likely they started in a formal sense and became more personal from there. You started out not really knowing that other person, but then you came to know them on a personal level because you found a way to make an inroads into their life.
1 Corinthians 13:4-5: “Charity suffereth long, [and] is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;” If we’re wondering about what is proper social protocol, much of it’s covered in these verses. If we put into practice these things, it would mitigate much of our confusion in how to conduct ourselves in personal relationships. It’s the basis for our relationship with God, and it’s the basis for our relationship with others. This can be a good template for us to follow if ever we find ourselves in uncharted territory.
Philippians 2:3: “[Let] nothing [be done] through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.” Much of our conversation can easily become one-sided affairs when it’s all about us. In order for it to qualify as a conversation it would have to involve the other person talking for at least some of that time. You talking in an endless promotion of yourself isn’t a conversation, or a dialogue—that’s known as a campaign speech. Unless you’re running for office, that kind of thing should be avoided. Let the other person have the floor for a little while. You might learn something you didn’t know before. You might even make a connection you couldn’t have made otherwise.
Proverbs 18:2: “A fool hath no delight in understanding, but that his heart may discover itself.” People can tell when you’re genuinely interested in them and what they’re saying. A part of having good people skills is just listening to what they’re saying, not pretending to listen while you’re really just waiting for them to finish. But this requires placing the other person before yourself in importance.
Titus 3:2: “To speak evil of no man, to be no brawlers, [but] gentle, shewing all meekness unto all men.” Avoiding gossip, contention, and harsh speech is a great starting point for connection. People can also recognize a humble person quickly. Someone who isn’t so worried about projecting themselves allows others to occupy some space in their orbit. Humility is an attractive quality. It will draw people to you that pride never will. This might be the best inroads of all. You can’t connect if it’s all about you. When you’re willing to defer to someone else, it shows you have the strength of character to do so. And it’s this yielding that can provide an open gate for relationship to begin.
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Philippians 2:3: “[Let] nothing [be done] through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.”
Proverbs 18:2: “A fool hath no delight in understanding, but that his heart may discover itself.”
Titus 3:2: “To speak evil of no man, to be no brawlers, [but] gentle, shewing all meekness unto all men.”