Unity without truth is meaningless, truth without love is harsh

 

Unity without truth is meaningless. I say this having recently been on both sides of this, on an issue of minor importance. But it showed me something important.

I found myself in a discussion with a friend recently. I won’t get into the issue that we were discussing. I will just say that it was an important issue, but it kind of wasn’t. I know that sounds cryptic or contradictory. However, the topic we were discussing was kind of ridiculous. I found myself trying to convince him something was false that I knew to be false. And I was trying to be nice about it. But you know how you get into a discussion and the further you get into it the more tensions rise. Well, that’s how this was. I was really making an effort to show him some things he was thinking on this topic weren’t correct. I was failing to make my case with him and I couldn’t understand why.

But I’m not a contentious person by nature, so I didn’t like this tension that had built up. The next time we talked I decided to be more civil, or so I thought. What I found myself doing, though, was conceding some points of the truth just so there wouldn’t be this disagreement. It was kind of the ‘go along to get along’ type thinking. But I didn’t like this either, because I knew I was compromising what I knew to be true just to forgo the argument.
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The next discussion we had was a bit more civil than the first. But I found out much of our debate was based on a misunderstanding he had of something very fundamental. We were discussing this for about an hour and a half before we got to the root of the misunderstanding. It kind of illustrated for me the importance of your definitions being the same. But finally he understood what I was saying and he came to understand my concept of things (which happened to be the right way). So, I was glad I stuck it out without conceding the point this time.

The first discussion wasn’t good because it was contentious without a point of understanding. The second discussion wasn’t good because I was conceding some things I knew to be right. See, I really wasn’t doing my friend any favors if getting along with him meant conceding the truth. Although that is easier sometimes and it is more agreeable to our emotions, it doesn’t lead us to a point of truth. I also wasn’t doing much good by presenting the truth in a manner that’s not palatable. If I’m discussing something with him just to show him I’m right, rather than with the intention of getting him to see truth, then that’s not loving. Sometimes we can be telling someone the truth, but they aren’t even willing to listen to us because our presentation is wrong.

…Let’s go deeper

 

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