The direction of our lives will inevitably go in the direction of our most predominate thoughts—an obvious, even undeniable truth, but still one that we tend to miss. We sometimes aren’t ignoring our problem areas, they are ever present in our minds every day. The difference is in the way we address those things. Many times our problem area is a problem area because we are looking to the problem for our solution. So, it’s not that we aren’t thinking about it, we’re just thinking about it in the wrong way.
The first step to examine our thinking is to examine what we’re thinking and ‘why’. Regardless of how obvious this seems, we still don’t do it much of the time. But the more we examine these things, the more the truth comes out. It’s not as elusive as it seems. It’s not rocket science, but we seem to make it into rocket science. Don’t complicate what was meant to be simple in the first place. What we subconsciously know sometimes has to be brought to the surface by active thinking. It’s kind of like digging for gold in a location where you know it’s located. You know it’s there, but you still have to do the digging.
Sometimes we need help with this. And that’s OK. We can go to counselors that will help illuminate some of the things we’re not seeing. In that case, they’re just a partner in the digging. In this case, you’re just saying, “I’m looking for some gold. Here, grab a shovel.” Some well-trained counselors are good at asking the right questions that can help us to get to the heart of the issue. Those things that have become problem areas in our lives aren’t really the problem. Usually they are just a symptom of a much bigger problem. It’s a peripheral effect of an abstruse cause. When properly pursued we can usually come to the point where we have an ‘ah ha’ moment. What once was obscure has now become so clear.
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Friends can also be valuable resources in these things. What we can’t see about ourselves they might be able to see about us. And that’s because they know us well enough to see it. Close friends not only have the advantage of perspective, but inside knowledge as well. If we can convince them to be objectively honest with us, it can yield some productive results.
Ultimately, once we come to an understanding of the root cause of our problems, we then need to take the next step of actively changing our thinking about that area of our lives. That can be one of the most difficult things. But you have to be persistent. That can be where the hard work comes in. But if you really commit to changing your thinking it will eventually yield results. It’s not automatic. It will take some practice. But I would wager that if you commit to doing it, the results you begin to see will provide the further motivation you need to keep going.