We’re a people of contradictions. To say we’re complex would be understating the matter. We don’t even understand ourselves, much less other people. Those things we think we know, we often don’t. Those things we don’t know, we rarely admit to not knowing. One could say we’re merely confused to simplify the matter. But if that were the case the solution would be simple. If confusion were our only condition we could at least know we are confused and then embark on a clearer understanding. It appears it runs much deeper than that. It seems our contradictions not only possess a duality of purpose but also double-ness of mind. But what happens in the midst of this duality?
The inconsistency in our lives is rarely better represented than by our pursuit of appearances. We buy things we don’t like to impress people we don’t know with money we don’t have. And though we may have a considerable amount of wealth, we spend like we’re filthy rich, which gives an outward appearance of opulence and, yet, in conversation talk as though we have nothing. And really this is just touching the surface of our conflicting pursuits. If we really want to delve deeper, we need to understand our motives in order to get to the root of it all. But are we willing to do this work? Do we really want to dig that deep to see what’s down there? Better, maybe, to keep the roots covered up with that nice green grass than to see the true structure of that unsightly root system.
We get in the habit of thinking that we can only work at cross-purposes with other people, and never consider the possibility that we might be working at cross-purposes with ourselves. The questions we have ready and waiting to ask others miss their true utility when not asking them about ourselves. Of course, our natural tendency is one where we avoid doing the hard work. But what would happen if we embarked on this journey of self-discovery. Certainly, we would find some things we didn’t like. But would that be such a bad thing? It’s our aversion to seeing ourselves as we truly are that precludes us from becoming what we could be. The change can’t happen unless I know a change needs to be made. So, where to begin?
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One thing apparent in our journey of self-discovery is that, in order to get to where we want to go, we first have to understand where we currently are. And, honestly, it takes courage for true honesty with ourselves. It’s not for the faint of heart. It does take insight into self, and it does take patience with oneself, to get to the heart of the matter. But the pain of self-discovery is overshadowed by the delight of truly discovering self. Don’t feel dejected while on this journey on which you are about to embark. Know that you are on a journey of a less travelled road. Few have endeavored to walk this narrow path. Though it may come through a vale of tears, the results it brings are beyond compare.