A cynical person has a tendency to see things in a rather negative light. Maybe they think that they’re just being realists. They tell themselves they’re not cynical; they just don’t want to be phony. Or, they tell themselves they are just smart enough to see things as they really are. They are the erudite observers who can see through all the chicanery that they believe is inherent in everyone—or so they think. But even with the bad elements they may be able to pick out all around them, they might just miss seeing the ones in themselves and, in the process, they willingly miss seeing the best parts of others and themselves.
I’ve noticed one thing about cynics: they rarely seem to be happy. If you’ve ever been around a cynical person, you’ll quickly notice that joy and positivity seems to elude them. There’s a cloud hanging over them, and the cloud is self-induced. And, to be fair, people don’t become cynical for no reason. Somewhere along the way, what inevitably happens to everybody happens to them—life deals them a hard hand. These times can be a telling indicator of which direction our lives are going to take. Will we respond by looking for and hoping for the best, or will we allow that moment to define us and color our perspective from then on?
I have to admit, I’ve been prone to cynicism at times in my own life. It’s not something I’m proud of. But I am thankful because I was able to learn something from it. Cynicism is like a poison: it infects everything around it and it speaks death to whoever is willing to receive it. A cynical person isn’t one who has figured out life, but one who has refused to live it.
I think when we’re cynical we feel justified in our negative opinions about people because sometimes we happen to be right. In all honesty, I think a cynic is really just afraid—afraid that what happened to them before just might happen to them again. They’re afraid to open themselves up again only to see their hopes and dreams dashed on the shores of an uncertain future. They were caught flat-footed before and they won’t allow it to happen again. But it’s nothing to be ashamed of when we believe for good things and they don’t always happen. It’s nothing to be ashamed of to have a hopeful heart.
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In not hoping for the best for other people, it doesn’t allow any room for them to aspire to greater things. Sure, they can still achieve them, but you’re adding a weight to them that makes it that much harder. By your cynicism, you’re placing a limiter on their hopes and dreams—your own hopes and dreams. For, whatever you fail to hope for others, you’ll have difficulty in hoping for yourself. The prism through which we see the lives of others tends to color the light by which we see our own.
But something to remember: opening yourself to the possibilities is something courageous. And when you do it for others, you can do it for yourself. There’s a life to be had in that hopeful arena, and it happens when we strip the cynicism from our life.