Trusting those in leadership can be a challenge, in no small part, and sometimes because of the fact that they are in a leadership position over us. It’s not even always that we don’t agree with them; we just sometimes want to buck the system. There seems to be a little bit of rebellion in all of us. Sometimes—maybe, just sometimes—we don’t want to listen because we don’t want to listen. Just ask our parents. They’ll know what we’re talking about. When asked, they’ll regale you with stories of your childhood when, by your own strong-willed behavior, you tried to prove you knew better as a two-year old than they did as experienced 30 year-old adults. I suppose that’s why we don’t ask.
Aside from our reluctance to take direction from someone else is also the fact that we sometimes—quite understandably—disagree with their direction. We just plainly see the situation differently than they do. We may even be right, which can be the toughest pill to swallow. In these situations, we don’t have to fold like a lawn chair. We can still stand up and make our opinions known. But the important mitigating factor is that we do it with respect and knowing that they are the ones in charge, and not us.
I can honestly say that there have been decisions made at every place I’ve ever worked that didn’t make sense to me. But truth be told, they didn’t have to. I was an employee and they weren’t my decisions to make. And as much I would have liked to think so, they didn’t have to listen to me. There may have been times when I said something, but mostly I didn’t. To be fair, what didn’t make sense to me could have been entirely due to the fact that I didn’t have the benefit of being in their position. I didn’t have access to all the knowledge that they had. Things look much different from 30,000 feet than they do on the ground. Honestly, there were some decisions made that really got to me. I just didn’t understand. But I didn’t need to understand; I just needed to do my job and trust the person in charge.
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But even beyond our desire to assert ourselves, I believe, lies an innate fear over losing control over the direction of our own lives. That probably scares us more than anything. That can actually be the thing that we’re really running from. All of the complaints about things we don’t understand or don’t make sense can really be just a smokescreen to hide what we really don’t like about the situation: the idea of yielding control to someone else. We like to be in charge. But there’s one important lesson we haven’t yet learned: those who became the best leaders are only such because they first learned how to be the best followers.